The Snow of LoVe.. DreaMlaNd NV fade

2008-10-04T23:23:00.000-07:00

got new lesson learn.. hw to drift thanks to my best buddy chua teck yong.. he teach me the angle all this nice.. den met up with priscilia again.. she look more and more nerdy la.. llol.. i went inside library and in front of her turn 2 round she still dunno i at where.. tooter is tooter.. den the speed she respond also slow.. aiya.. she very funny la.. den keep asking me i work where say le she blur.. bugis is small u can find de..

2008-09-25T08:39:00.000-07:00

she finally give up.. lol
apart of me is holding on n apart of me is letting go.. but i know i have to let go...
she do so much for me but wad i did for her..
reading this shud make u laugh at hw stupid i m ..
y muz i let go?? i use 6mth to ask myself this y??
if u hurt the gal u love b4 and she told u dat the feeling fade le.. will u still hang on..
i hurt myself for 3 mths.. and when i decide to fight for my love.. its 2 late..
u will say its nv 2 late.. but she told me she was sick n tired of mi le..
lol.. after she left i still feel she loves me alot.. i juz wanna sae sorry.. i feel he is better ba.. that y i didnt fight le.. jia you ba.. u will have ur happiness de...

but i promise.. the next gal.. i will cherish de. coz i knw hw hurt it is to let go of the gal u love..
actually i nt as strong as i seems.. but everything is 2 late le ba... yuan liang wo

2008-07-06T05:21:00.000-07:00

ya.. den i meet up with priscilla..
lol..
she was damn cute la.. so white... lol.. i mean fair in the skin colour...
den she was standing near the ctrl wearing this very nerdy spec.. k la.. honestly she was quite pretty la ar.. later ppl sae i nv sae nice things about her.. den she was wearing her school P.T uniform and short running pant.. sound quite attarctive rite? but haha.. when i saw the skin colour i can laugh sia.. really she really very fair...
den we headed down to outram , meanwhile down to outram i saw this baby damn cute.. den when we reach outram,i went 7-11 buy cigg.. honestly i BTH den buy liao.. was intending to quit de.. but bo bian BTH liao la.. den wanna buy.. guess wad.. this freaking chee bye auntie.. ask me for I/C.. i let her c ez link she still dun understand den bo bian lo.. take my I/C which is a 11b to let her.. she c liao also blur.. i look at her c i also blur.. so blur blur she sae ok.. then priscilla buy mineral water.. if is me ar.. i rather dun buy at 7-11 damn expensive compare to other shop.. but aiya small gal dun understand de la..
den comapny her go for her dance at the dance studio near outram.. lol.. she pass me her BC to help her do her ez link.. funny part is she nv gv me her photo.. den bo bian i tell the pass officer dat she still look e same.. lol...
den wait 4 her from 5.30 to 6p, she came out and take from me the ez link den company me go drink water opp..
such a sweet gal.. but den she got very weird stance like talk muz out her hand on her lower chin.. very funny la.. but overall i find her a very cute gal and nice gal la.. juz hope she wont turn bad la..

2008-07-06T05:10:00.000-07:00

ran out of camp to help ppl do thing la.. den kena caught fucking suay...
i think will go jail or sumthing aiya no mood to care liao...
meet up with priscilla.. at hougang mrt.. on the way was thinking of three things.. one is my mother...
she used to b so stronger and nw yearns for my return hme everyday,wishing i cud company her.. but ya.. u all shud knw me. feeling wont put on face and always make her sad.. but mum, thanks for ur everything.. i really hope u wud recover as fast as possible...
second is my head(choon sia) wad really happen to both of us.. i thou we were so close.but nw we r like drift further? did i did something wrong? is nt i wan this place.. i know u come in this gang longer than me.. but i have no choice when they want me to hold i higher place.. i really dun wish this to happen this way.. i rather get out of this gang if it happen like this...
lastly my love life.. why is my love life like crap? i juz wan someone who really can understand me and last together..i know u all wud sae that pearl is gd.. i know she is gd but she really too controlling liao.. sometime in a relationship u need to gv time to each other to breathe de ma..

2008-07-01T09:25:00.000-07:00

was quite tired todae .. nothing to do..
yesterday went out with max they all..
he drove his company to fetch me.. then drove me to RP.. coz he know i wanna c someone.. den he really drove inside RP.. wtf.. but nv saw her.. thanks max for ur fucking effort.. den after that we went to boon keng and back to his huse.. from his huse i drove the car to return his frend.. wtf juz came out kena police car.. but lucky nv tio caught haha..
haha... this few days.. actually quite down la.. 1 is miss her.. 2 is she been avoiding my call and she say nv..
juz wanna sae.. if u dun like me i understand.. but can at least dun avoid my call. u know how sad m i ?? if u dun like me den y did u hold my hand?? yy?? now my life is like from heaven drop to hell and stab in my heart hundred over times.. thanks ar...

i dunno how to trust love anymore.. is like u hold me and say i will think abt it.. after u think den u let go everything and sae we can b frend.. but now?? r we?? no nt at all..
thks for wadever u have done.. my heart totally crash like fuck and dun ever let me c eu.. i know i will freaking cry in front of eu...

2008-06-21T07:22:00.000-07:00

haha.. back to update haha...
find that after go ns alot of bro rarely contact de..
haha..
sick and tired of relationship thing..
going to have a fight soon..
very big fight..
live or not i dunno..
hope i live..

2008-06-17T20:40:00.000-07:00

wad a dae sia..
sick like hell but still need to work la...
nw finding giddy coz of the medicine...
hai miss her la..
but useless... coz she dun like me de..
i think she like someone else ba...
but anyway.. OL gang...
when meet out la.. thursday can??
i thinking of go sakura eat la.. but c u all how k

2008-06-17T05:23:00.000-07:00

sian.. sick sick sick...
haha.. sore throat fever and giddy
was planning to meet all my ite frends..
but hor not all free..
she told me le.. she wanna be single..
but hope one day she will accept me one day coz i really wanna b with yew...
but gal as much as i wanna respect eu
i hope u can think about it again..
i know its like not respecting you..
but its b coz i wish i can get hold of e chance to dote on you..
i promise it will b a happy relationship..

2008-06-16T03:58:00.000-07:00

specially to my brother..
brothers of mine.. like minyi , philip and alot more out there..
sometime i may seems bossy and like everything i wan my way..
but i only want u all to b safe..
i dun wish to c my brother to die again..
i seen alot of my brother die le..
i dun wanna lose you all ok...
sometime i waste money on eu all is nt b coz 2 much money..
if dun waste next tym no tym waste liao ar..
hope eu all understand...
life only have once.. brother only for once in a lifetime..
same to gal.. love only once.. and whether to treasure it only once in a lifetime and i will take the chance if u gimme..

guys.. ps.. i will die for you all.. but dun make yourself too xin ku..
any problem juz say out..
i will try my best to help..
i am sick and tired of being pop... but i nt sick of helping you all know ma??..
hope you all will b xin fu and dun scare i xin fu or not k...

2008-06-16T03:51:00.001-07:00

jus now was driving to NEE SOON CAMP...
den i ask my passenger that if he wan go long way or short..
den he tell me is it i wanna c my gf?
i say no nt gf la.. so we decided to take the long way..
we went past old woodland road and past republic poly..
haha.. i was like going drive my car straight in la. but aiya.. cannot la.
so prominent. so i decided to send her a msg.. but aiya frankly i miss her and wanna c her.
but dun dare say.. wth.. i boi or gay sia??
den ask her wad tym end school.. for fuck u wanna know wad tym ppl end school...
she not even ur gf la... but honestly how i hope she was..
haha... dream on la panda warrior.. lol..
den she ask me y twice i think.. and i juz say nth juz asking wth..
miss ppl y cannot juz say la.. tooter...
and now miss her again.. hai.. sumtimes i cannot understand wtf i thinking..
say stupid nt really say clever not really.. wtf la!!!

2008-06-16T03:42:00.000-07:00

today another day in camp den very sian sioh..
was stunned at the last minute when they say i need go nee soon camp
wad wad the the hell!!!!!!!!!!!
then never bring wallet, 11b, camp pass and all the important stuff.
so damn fed up, kena scold y i so late.. hey how i know when u dun even call me to tell me la..
haha.. call gal at 7am.. coz she need go school ma.. den today reopen of her school days..
hope she is happy la.. imagine holidays cannot c frend den finally can c them...
hai kinda miss ite when we joke and tok crap. skip class sleep in class..
sound damn bad thats the way we behave..
in ite wa.. super sia.. nth find problem.. den when call brother super lots sia...
always win never lose sia....
still remember the jason.. althou he handsome la.. but freaking hum ji lo.. lol..
den remember when we having entrepreneur club.
always work with wei hao, yengling the airpork, suyu, shin hui (hai) and shiyun to do wad coffee stuff la.. den everytime is wei hao idea.. den i help sell, drink free de somemore haha..
but those were the days when i really love school life..

2008-06-15T05:43:00.000-07:00

lol.. girl todae told me that maybe we shud know each other more before getting together ..
hee.. actually i sumhow agree la.. coz we know each other 2 days onli.. den summore i so toot de..
but really xin fu to know eu. girl i wait for eu.. and i think waiting for eu will b a happy and fun de.. maybe is i too afraid to lose a good gal dats y keep asking .. sorry k??

haha.. den todae play soccer.. my god my skill suck liao.. not like last tym .. maybe really old liao.. but hey badminton i think still can.. hope can play with girl once.. but like she win me.. oops i gonna throw face.. den she will sae i monkey hand so long cannot play badminton.. lol.. no lo.. i actually is pork lai de.. oops isnt that yengling the air pork.. no i still b my gal gal monkey better.. lol..

ya den play til very tired.. '

gal no matter ur decision.. i b waiting till eu accept me..
but till the dae eu accept me.. i will b loving eu like eu r the world to me k..
siian.. gal going start school liao.. den i think she will b more busy le..
but nvm.. i can help her massage.. but if her bone break.. luckily got hospital.. lol..
if hospital cannot solve got chinese seh sin.. haha.. like very cruel.. but bleah.. who ask her sae i monkey.. bleah...

2008-06-15T02:28:00.000-07:00

and sumtimes i dun understand such a cool animation and some people make it look so sluttish... let c and u understand..

http://www.flickr.com/photos/sorato/752580096/

this one laggy worst..

2008-06-15T02:25:00.000-07:00

see this and tell me look alike not

to me this gal is damn good in cosplay

2008-06-15T02:01:00.000-07:00

SIAN AR.........
guess wad i kena confine for sleeping den next week duty week somemore..
total 11 days in camp leh... omg .. cannot c her for 11 days leh..
lol.. super lame... ya wake up todae den saw my fan from 90 degrees angle become 180 degrees angle den i know spoil liao.. by the tym i carry it the whole thing broke.. den all my platoon mate look at me den sae,"wtf!! u spoil another fan??" sia la.. as if i wan.. but it broke itself ma.. not my fault also..
haha.. wake up sure muz smoke de.. then open up my packet o.. fuck that la.. left 2 stick.. so as my gina JUSTIN(AH LONG) to help mi buy and gimme todae.. actually tok about him also sian fucking gimme alot of trouble..but ok la.. as frend he been there for me..
den another one is mingyi.. i admit i very spoilt him any thing even he wrong i still will do until he is right . den he ask me why i ask him find gf?? coz wan him settle down la.. den he tell me dun wan.. he wan play around first.. wtf la..
den got a gal name grace la.. come my blog peek ,y post nv shout out comment .. sob la.. at least say something ma. so cruel (hokkien).. lol..

2008-06-14T11:18:00.000-07:00

wake up..
den keep thinking of her sia..
is it i siao or wad??
i call her out and lie to my mum sae i go camp.. very bad ar..
but i wan to c her lo..
my mum know wont let de...
but manage get her out..
took her for a movie..
hope she like the movie..
pei her to bugis.. how i wish she will sleep in bus and sleep on my shoulder or chest...
but she tell me she wont sleep in bus de..
lol..
reach bugis le.. den was walking toward bjs.. bugis street la..
den upon crossing the road.. was telling myself.. if i dun hold her hand..
i wont even have a chance.. at least let her know that i got feeling for her..
den dunno wad shit struck me and hold her hand across..
luckily she nv reject sia..if nt my head really must find exhaust pipe and hide liao..
but really i rather hold her hand stand there forever and no car come the whole only we two..
wa damn childish la..
in love i think is like dat de..
den on and off hold her hand..
we meet her frend and went to suntec..
dunno also wad shit struck me to ask her if she wud b my gf..
nv ask face to face b4 leh..
wtf.. so shy sia..
lol.. den while going home dat tym ask again..
den she sae gv her tym to think..
also true la..
know 2 days onli sia..
but really i wanna settle down liao..
and this gal i really the gal i wanna settle down..
fail alot of relationship.. but i will treasure this one..
gal if by chance u got to read this..

it maybe 2 days.. but i m attarcted.. it maybe few hours.. but i fallen for u.
i dun wanna know wads ur past i juz wanna love you.. at least lemme try.
i dunno wad is this feeling. but i am missing a gal that is not very pretty .
i dun care u pretty or not. i juz know something in me is attarcting me to u.
my heart beats fast when i c u. ur thinking and words make me attarcted to u.
forever may seem a common word. so lemme say when our love will last when u gimme a chance. its everlasting bond. til my last breath. never had this feeling b4. never.. grace.. its a gift to know u. i wanna treasure this gift and never let go.
sarang heyo, te amo la... all i say la.. but dun ask me sae face to face.. i think will like monkey buttock la.lol.. but gal gimme a chance hao bu hao?? at least lemme have a chance to give eu xin fu.

2008-06-14T11:06:00.000-07:00

finally got her number and her name was G****..
haha...
ask her to come out and we went amk...
she didnt eat la..
i so bad la.. dunno she eat or never eat...
so dissappointing..
den she sae when i coming towards her like so fierce..
maybe i rarely smile le..
the past thing has made me to smile less.
but we ate le..
wa the food i ate was so little and cost me 6.50...
so ex .. but nvm being out with such a cute gal
worth it...
was not interested in so many chio gal for the past month but was so into her..
honeslty she nt very chio but the chemistry she have .. so weird and attarctive to me..
but seriously is it b coz u 2 cute or b coz we r meant to b?
send her home and found out she live near woodbridge..
if can i rather go woodbridge live den everyday can c her.. lol.. siao liao
she is a wierd gal dun like animal feel that they r er xin..
was so stunned
shuldnt all gal like cute thing..
but this gal so funny
and special..
god thanks for letting me meet this gal..

2008-06-14T10:58:00.000-07:00

went to bbq with matthew and sky...
wa know them one day go out together with them to so many places..
reach bbq.. den alot of gals i dunno de..
but saw this gal with hat... she was quite short.. but she caught my eyes.
den later manage to ask her play daidi with us...
she damn cute la..
the way she speak and the way she do things..
the first sight was really impressive...
den when i really get to talk to her..
the way she c thing r so impress..
but i think i nt fit to ask her for number ba
but later sky ask me..
i have to admit i like her..
so ask sky ask lo...

2008-06-14T10:50:00.000-07:00

forget the past le...
i think 1 year past le ba...
hope i m able to put the past behind towards my future.
but guess wad when i decide to b gd..
one big thing struck me..
my mum gena cancer..
wad i can do??!!
dunno so i keep drinking and smoke..
strong outside cry inside..
lose all my brother..
weihao, joel, max, yishun wei hao, yengling, suyu...
maybe is i too self centered...
luckily they came back to me le..
to all my frend out there...
thanks alot..
i sorry for wad i done..
selfishness on my side but i juz dun wan u all to worry..
i also know alot of trustworthy friends this years..
minyi,philip,alton and desmond... thanks you all
shoban thanks for being there always...
u the closest brother i ever had.. thanks..
ya... thanks to the guys out there god bless ya

2008-06-14T10:38:00.001-07:00

cause everytime we touch i get this feeling
everytime we kiss i swear i can fly
cant you feel my heart beat fast i want this to last
need you by my side
cause everytime we touch

wake up with you next to me
im thinkin how can this be
god its true you're blessin me
its destiny, me and you were meant to be uh
when i touch you, you know i love you
but i still put it down like a thug do
know you like that, yeah you like that
its a love that i that i had to write that
argue and you dont even fight back
baby girl you put me on the right track
not another peson i could see myself with
kno the way it sounds sounds kinda selfish but
your the one who put me in this position
im wishin theres nothin in this relationship
that we missin yeah
you dont know what you mean to me
am i living in a fantasy?
na just be real
girl how you make me feel
me & you we know the deal
aint nothin gonna stop us now,
slow us down cause you know
that we hold this down
its the hands that i reach and clutch
lean on when i need that crutch
baby girl yeah i know this much cause
everytime we touch
everytime we touch and ride
people wanna front and lie
duck and hide lower your pride
need you by my side girl
for when we kiss you fly
g4 touch down 745
before me and u were down to ride
now its at a point we gotta try so
we go out at turks and caicos
somewhere to convert dollars to pesos
lay low when we gives kisses to besos
you get a feeling thats what you say so
its DO whats the PO if you love me why you play FO?
i dont know, this ring glow, wanna put it on?
i dont know, its crazy when we get along
we aint holdin hands but i read your palm
heart beat fast, i aint feelin calm
want this to last, everlastin bond but
its like a light switch on and off
leave you in things so you could floss
whats the cost if you could feel me
i want you to turn around and you could tell me

cause everytime we touch i get this feeling
everytime we kiss i swear i can fly
cant you feel my heart beat fast i want this to last
need you by my side
cause everytime we touch

dont think cause im a thug
that ima hide my love
i know we're gonna last
cause i need you boo
everytime we touch its me and you

dont think cause im on drugs
that ima hide my love
i know were gonna last
i need you boo
everytime we touch its me and you

cause everytime we touch i get this feeling
everytime we kiss i swear i can fly
cant you feel my heart beat fast i want this to last
need you by my side
cause everytime we touch...........

this song is that damn nice.. its called everytime we touch r`n'b remix..
and the 5 time i heard this i found that special one..
fated or destiny??
i dunno

2008-06-14T10:34:00.000-07:00

back to update

2007-05-30T10:09:00.000-07:00

..hurt....
no nt b coz eu dun love me anymore no..
juz b coz i cud nt do a promise to eu properly..
dat dae i vomit blood and my nose juz bleed...
this few daes i cant get to c eu coz i dun dare to see eu.. i scare i may really broke down... my frend try to console me but?? i still cry.. even in the front of my gal... i still cry b coz i know i cant forget eu... when will i forget eu? when?
eu really think i wanna gv up?
i juz wanna hide... wanna hide that i m so weak...
but wad can i do?... eu dun thionk we can last..
there nth i can do le..
i juz wanna sae..
i truly love eu from the dae i love eu.. i love eu with the btm of my heart..
yes i may tok back to eu...
but i wanna make eu happy..
but i know i cant..
angela..
i truly love eu frm the btm of my heart....

2007-05-12T10:56:00.000-07:00

hai.. really miss her alot..
but juz dun dare to tell her ba..
i read her..
i think she still gt cry ba..
juz that she nv tell me ba..
but i also dun have the rite to guan..
coz in her life.. i onli her frend..
so.. maybe i think i have to learn to give up ba..
cry le 2 years.. but dun seems to take anything back.. only keep hurting myself..
shud i gv up? or juz wait till she reliease that i m there for her?
or?shud dyin solve the mysteries?..
really dunno .. keep trying to stop thinking of her.. but when i smoke.. i remember everything..
the first time she slp on my chest.. the first tym she hold my hand like no gal ever did..
but wad for? she no more my gal le.. juz have to accept ba

2007-04-30T22:58:00.000-07:00

today went out with her..
i was really attract to her..
coz.. the way she talk to kids was so cute..
and the way she slp on my shoulder..
and she told me if i dun talk back to her
she will love me..
i was so shocked when she say this..
if only she knows i wanna love her..
hais..
always blame myself dun have the courage to tell her in the face..
she told me alot of story..
alot of things that happen in her life..
alot of ups and down..
dunno y i have the patience to listen also..
den i notice we really behave like couple..
but my dream ba...
on the way home..
i really hope we stay in the mrt forever..
coz i juz dun wan to leave..
but haiz..
when i reach hme and saw her msn..
it says"i hope i wont fall for u again..i think i miss you..."
i ask her who she miss..
actually the answer i want is.."U"
but she say she dun know..
juz write for fun..
maybe ba..
angela..
i juz wanna say..
i m there for u..

2007-04-30T22:30:00.000-07:00

...
been looking for song to put on my blog..
then found this song lo..
honestly i very scare to put this song..
cos everytime listen to this song..
i will cry..
but i try to brave it thru to put ba..
onli this song can truely say my feeling ba.
i been writing a lot of letter..
but nv dare to gv her every piece of it..
maybe is the fear of her being more fan ba..
juz wanna let her know beside him..
there is me to care and love her..
u say becos we understand each other too much thts y being together is very wierd..
but do u know i dun really understand myself..
i juz wan someone to understand myself..
and u r the gal..
but wad u say makes me become blur of wad love is le..

remember when u play this song..
and i told u..
this song really describing about us..
and u ask y..
i explain everything to u..
and i cried le..
tht was the first tym i brk down in front of u..
but u said dun cry..
maybe ba..
u really numb le..
like me..
but r we really numb?
r we really have no feeling?
or r we hiding?

u say u wanna find a stead..
but do u know there is one person always waiting for u.

2007-04-27T06:23:00.000-07:00

life is full of ups and down..
but mine seems to b all down no up..
stress and sadness everyday..
why?
i juz wanna have someone who can understand me..
someone to love me..
someone to care for me..
but?
why u say i understand u
and u keep on saying things that hurt me..?
is this the way to hurt urself from falling in love with me.
is this why u keep on pretending and hiding?
if this is so...
den i hope u will live better ba...
hope u know what i do is for ur gd ba..
if u think that making me give up is gd for u..
den..
i hope u understand that i m been force to give up nt i wan..
yes this is the way i m..
u may say i m flirt..
u may sae that i m useless..
but if saying all this make u feel better..
as u wish ba..
now all i need is someone to love me..
some to care for me..
if there is ...
pls.. save me from falling..
coz falling to somewhere i dunno is very scary and honestly i dun dare to face it..
if u cant save me from fallin.. plz let go.. coz u dun understand me ...
if there is someone..
tell me.. i may wanna cry it all out..
really..
i really cant take it le...
i been withstanding all this too long le...
my heart and everything really going to tired le..
maybe going to stop soon...
frends out there.. to u all.. i may b the one always laughing joking..
but i juz dun wanna show my feelin..
i scare i may brk down..
even i m too scare to face myself..
so i think its better to hide everything ba..
actually i dun wan to b myself..
i wanna b some superman which can withstand everything..
but i m nt superman.. i nt wonder man..
i m juz a human..
a human which have feeling also..
a human which need a shoulder to cry ..
a human which will do wrong thing de..
a human which needs to cry..
a human who need loves...
but i dun think the thing i get is human de..
its more like a robot de..
i dun need a perfect gal..
i juz need..
someone to understand and care for my feeling..
why is it so hard?
why?
why?
i try to cut myself severly..
but i cant feel the pain..
yes i m numb le..

2007-04-27T06:13:00.000-07:00

...sian..
today sick again.. kena ask to go ttsh..
go there tio x-ray..
wa.. the x-ray of my lung very nice sia..
coz yesterdae vomit blood...
then he say is nt from the stomach is from the lung de...
then need x-ray..
the lung de vein super thick sia..
he say i exercise alot..
thats y so thick.. hey prove i healthy sia..no la..
btw guys my stomach become stage 1 le...
but i still really gd mood...
first i got sick today..
went hme..
my parent say i alot of problem..
say til like i wanna b sick like dat..
den went to hospital with me..
nvm.. go home.. juz wanna come out awhile to sort my things...
but leh? she say i go meet gal..
fine.. i meet angela..
guess wad she sae to me..
she say u sick not my problem wad...
double fed up and sad..

nvm la.. used to it le...
if it is like dat then like dat lo..
really dun have the mood to do anything...
but a spark suddenly grow..
this gal.. she ask me hao ma..
she saae she wanna b my gal..
i really cant promise anything..
juz to say..
if she really love me..
den hope she understand wad i need ba..
yes she is a gd gal..
but i cant promise i m a gd boi..
she say she dun wan me c gal gal..
the prob is i nt interest le...

2007-04-21T09:59:00.000-07:00

.. today went out with angela...
she cried again..
althou i didnt sae out.
but i think.. she saw it or rather feel it..
when i lend her my shoulder..
i really nearly cried out..
she really been thru too much le..
she try to laugh in front of me..
but.. i know
she is very sad inside..
i dunno when i can let her know..
let her know i wanna care for her..
maybe it is a forever secret ba..
till dat dae come i think she alread have a bf le ba..
able to b there when she cry is enuff..

do u know that i wanna hold u?
do u know that i wanna love u?
how i wish i got the courage to say out..
but i think u wont b able to understand..

yesterddae call carol den know u all also gt problem..
anyway hope we can meet up..

2007-04-18T09:36:00.000-07:00

..sick...

was on medication for quite long...
today was 18.04.07 5th time i faint le...
went to medical centre for consult...
was send to sickbay or rather their hospital for drip..
4 drip for 5 hour.. very weak le...
from monday til now nv eat a single thing...
every time eat le will vomit...
was ask to go home..
i smoke again le..
... i was asked to book out and go home rest...

i went to see my ex..
coz i promise to buy something for her.. i really brought le..
she accept it and finally she smile le..
she ask me why i look so pale..
i told her why and she care alot ...
but when i asked why she care she say she will care as long as its frend..
i was sad le..
i told her i really wanna b with her..
she told me.. she dun dare to b with ns guy..
she ask me to think again after two years..
i know i will wait but by the time..
will she b single? will she b the same?
will she change? will she move house?
will i die? will i move her again?
will she tell me all her prob?
i dunno.. but i wait ba...

i really need her ba... ya btw xin hui is my mei again le..
guys if u all wanna contact me or talk with me can call me k
coz we long tym nv talk also.. k la.. my stomach pain again le..
bye..

2007-04-15T04:08:00.000-07:00

guys really long time no c le.. i think 2 years or so ba...finally back to write my blog le.. since i go in ns this is my first blog le. ha.. ya things happen fast.. i m single again.. no nt her fault is i do something wrong that i cant forgive myself..

i miss my ex again...
angela...

i had to brk up so as to b fair to pearl... i m a man.. if i did something wrong i have to face it.. i now wanna b single awhile ba.. hope to get my mind straight at wad i wanna do...yes u all may think i m stupid.. but to me.. i really dun wanna hurt anyone..

i rather i hurt myself den anyone get hurt because of me.. selfish? if they have a better future, why not?.. being with me is so xin ku... yes i smoke again le... frends.. hope we get in contact...

angela... if u really think u will b much happier this way.. i really hope u b happy ba.. if u need to cry or shed ur tear.. u can call me i will b there for u..

pearl.. sorry i have to do this.. but i make a mistake.. i really cant forgive myself.. i dun wanna treat.. plz understand that at least i m man enuff to tell u the truth..we can still b frend ba.. sorry..

guys.. over this few daes i really did a lot of wrong things.. so maybe u all could get update

2006-05-25T09:42:00.000-07:00

yoyo.. backie

how you guys life? mine has been ups and down... made my dear angry again... den manage to make her forgive me... den after that vanessa chalet which i enjoy.. i know nw one of my bro NIGEL...k... den we went out once with hao... play pool.. honestly i m lousi... but i also help them fork out a bit la.. den they play datona... which i think i m sian with it liao la... den i m nigel manage to b brother. den there once.. his brother tai ji la.. he ask me,joel,shoban,sandy,weilun and that girl they call her sotong la.. she very fucking noisy.. hate her la.. but aiya she my brother frend juz ren.. den after tht i whack one of the boys.. then shoban help out.. den from den on i with them very close la.. cos my onli brother wei hao went in ns.. rarely can contact him la.. den yesterday... this nigel funny la...jealous dun say jealous den went to nyp.. den that 2 guy who like tht gal tht nigel like also very funny.. one look beng one 2 hole in the teeth.. den nigel wanna fight also laugh den in the end talk properly.. ya.. den everything ok... my dear also very cute la..meet me at tm den her whole face let me look more the more i wanna kiss her.. dunno y when u like someone wad ever she do u will think she is cute ba...

i fall for her very deep la..used to think we wont b together.. but now? no matter liao la.. i wanna love all the way... ppl wanna beat me i also love ar...guys better get ur hands off my girl.. or i break ur nose ur thing ur hand everything...protective rite? k la.. coz i dun like boys talk to her very close.. will jealous know? i jealous will say out not like that nigel.. LOL... k la.. guys take care...

Family:OL coolster
Brother: Weihao,Shoban,Nigel,Sandy,Ah loong,Joel,Weisiang,Kika gina.. (by ranking de)
the one and only dear:Pearl Ng nan ping
gd frend:Carol,Maisei,Vanessa,June,Linda,Suyu....

2006-03-19T06:36:00.000-08:00

back back

yea.. update le.. lost my IVP.. my first was against a guy which is 187 yo 1189 de height la.. den was fighting him til i was so blur.. cant find his weakness lo.. thts y lose..
but lucky.. my madam asking mi go national tis aug.. go there take exp.. nt bad sia..
tis few dae quite stress la.. thinking of wad to study.. appeal where
my dear tio beauty therapy.. she so damn happy... i also happy for her la.. guys long tym nv go sentosa le.. go sumdae k? miss you all...

IF IT WASNT MI TO LOVE YOU? WHO ELSE?
IF IT WASNT YOU THAT I M DESTINED TO FALL FOR? WHY I HAVE U IN MY DREAM

ya.. this few dae keep having tis nightmare dat i m going hell.. and all those vampire all things appear in my nightmare too.. then i go church they sae i m the follower of LUCIFER
know who is that? he is the creator of sin such as murder,rape,robbery,sin and crime.... thats y.. little stress la

2006-02-16T07:59:00.000-08:00

backie..

haiz... todae went training wpr.. then got the news i been selected for IVP.. haiz.. dunno true a not.. true liao.. but dunno i can not? can le.. dunno whether i can take the medal not.. haiz.. dunno la.. dun wanna think le.. sumtimes i hope i can go and die.. haiz.. die le no worries.. ppl wont have to care for mi tis fucker.. hate my self alot.. todae open com.. den saw fernades add mi in frendster.. i was so shock and afraid.. is there a motive behind wad he did.. reali dunno
.. dunno wanna accept his request or? hai so stressed.. alot of things make me stress...in life we need to learn alot.. like how to solve ur problem.. but me? a useless pig tht cannot do any archeivement in life.. y god dun lemme die but torture me? .. haiz.. forget it..

-----friends----
it means a little to me when i did something nice to u
but it means a lot to u
its means some much to mi when u were there for me
but it means so little for u
its means so much to mi when u r hurt
but to u u dun wanna c mi hurt more

2006-02-15T08:56:00.000-08:00

backie

this few daes reali depressed... sumtimes feel as if i not a human.. as i m doing more than wad a human is expected to do..did u know how much i feel when u r sad angry vex? life goes when i m sad. life goes when u r sad but onli me knows how u feel but i dunno how to tell u.. sumtimes useless is how i feel..its hard to understand wad i want.. but does wad i want realli matters. to me the important things is wad u want can i gv? i try.. to the bottom of my heart.. i b true to you.. to the deepest soul of me.. i b frank to u.. my feeling to u rite now is more than words can sae le..finding a gal is easy.. finding sumone to hold my hand with is easy.. but finding a gal that i truely love.. truely needs.. truely dun wanna lose is hard.. and i found u...

------bottom of my heart i swear to u i b true to u-------

but as i find u .. i started to think of wad i can gv u.. not onli treasure.. not onli love.. but sumthing that can bind us together... but i cant.. so i try my best to forget the possibility of us being together.. i lie..i regret.. i hurt myself everyday..by telling u i love sumone else when my heart is with u.. hard.. its hard to understand the feeling i got....the days of you saying u need me become lesser.. the hope thinner..the love stronger.... sumtimes i ask myself y i need to do this to torture myself?? i know.. i dun wanna lose a chance of being with u.. therefore.. i strive...
------to b with you.. i do anything including torturing myself-------
the dae i was sad..nt b coz of her.. is b coz of u..i wasnt able to let u know i love you in my heart.. not able to tell u i wanna hug u in my arms and not letting go.. u told me u love me.. my heart stops thumping.. the words come out .. unbelieve.. i told myself.. u r trying to make me happi..as u told mi b4 its hard to forget a first love.. but u insist u love me.. and its true from ur mouth.. i try to accept..
------every words from u is a treasure to mi------
i accept with a dreams that has been come true.. no hiding my feeling from u... no that we are both in a road.. a path.. i dunno wad lies in front us.. i dun wanna know liao.. if being wit u is sumthing that keeps mi living.. i live with every day hoping 2 love u..loving u is a pursue for mi to live...missing an hour make mi realize hw important u mean to mi..in e end i dun care hu there.. i know i wanna face the challenge to keep u by my side.. i hope it will last(who dont).. but can i survive? i dunno.. but thanks.. for making my dream come true.. letting me mature more..
------can i survive? can u b with me forever??i love you with all my life------

2006-02-14T09:18:00.000-08:00

things in this world has a temporary stand but a permanent effect
things u imagine has a temporary dreams but a permanent affect
things that u deem to have eventually will leave
things that u thou has becum urs will eventually nt b
things that u think will last will eventually b lose if u dun treasure
things that seems simple may turn out to b hard and diffcult
things that seem not urs will eventually b..

sumtime its hard to tell
but sumtimes it is easy
we may seems like a frend
but in long,
u will forget hu i m
i will slowly let go of the frendship
but in first
did u ever try to treasure
did u ever try to understand
i try so much
but will u ever know?
the way u teach me to do things
the way u tell me wad is wrong and rite
the way u ask me how i feel
but now?
you wont even call me
not say a greeting from u
not to say a hi when we saw each other
so how shud i live with it?
i shud nw try to understand wad u trying to tell me
u r telling mi to let go
this is another thing you teach me
b strong..
b very strong
b cold
b very cold
sumtimes i wonder hw
but now i know......
i shud b the demon now
u b the angel
we shud nv met......

2006-01-31T08:21:00.000-08:00

...updating in progress....

CNY past le.. quite happi.. but i gt thing nt happi.. i miss my dear dear la.. miss her miss her...
hai... recieve my NS letter... den quite shocked sad worry and happi lo... wierd rite.. get letter y gt so many feeling??.. k tell u all ba.. shocked coz i dunno so fast will get e letter lo... sad coz i going ns den wont get to c my dear and frend so often lo.. worri coz i dunno whether my dear will wait for mi nt lo.. coz i no use de.. happy coz i going b a real man liao.. yea yea..

real man is real man la.. still cant bear lose my dear dear la... LOL... dunno y la.. mayb she play a important role in my life la.. or maybe i miss her too much la.. den i also miss tht mole la... without him i no one psycho la... lol...

dear.. there is alot of things i wanna tell u .. but everything c u i rather i quite and c the face i love longer.. coz i scare the next dae i couldnt c u again.. and if thts so y nt i juz look at the face i love... and put it in my brain and alwayz remember it.. and dream abt it.. kissing u the way i like.. but when will our love have a happi ending.. i hope fast.. but can it? i dunno... fate ba.. loving sumone will need to miss her badly .. LOL.. hai.. think too much also no use de... but i juz know treasure the moment now.. dun lose it liao lo.. if nt bad la...

2006-01-20T08:34:00.000-08:00

yoyo.. my dear ask mi post liao... so baddie

k la.. anyway this few daes quite nice.. celebrate wei siang bd.. we was quite unhappi at the beginning.. coz of waiting and sum unhappy arise between us.. but anyway, hope past is past le k? ya we went wei siang huse to celebrate.. den my dear super cute sia.. she look into the tank near the com.. den she saw this two lizard she scare til like her leg going soft liao la...den i explain to her the things i know about the lizard..actually is learn frm documantry de show de... LOL...i buy beer la.. but is david pay de la... den we drink at wei siang huse lo.. quite fun.. den ask dear drink coz when ever i nt wit her she drink wit her she dun drink.. cute rite? wan me worri onli..

den its time we decide where to eat lo.. we decide very long.. concerning the price, transport and quality.. den we went toa payoh.. but no more buffet so decide to go macpershon pink huse.. wei siang order alot.. but hope the food is nice coz i recommended de... so wei siang hope u like the food la...

ya todae have taekwondo juz cum back... very tired.. madam order me to do some move which require agility and strength.. i failed most of them.. den she ask me go simei try out IvP for experience... den i sae ok lo.. i have a blue black and my leg(upper) and(lower)... den a torn ligament near my groin area... but manage to stop the pain... den have a blue black at my buttock.. which is erm... unusual.. den swollen hand.. but anyway stuggle to recover before wednesdae lo.. coz ben and zhi cong ask me go down simei ite for IvP.. like i very pro lidat... everywhere ask me go sia.. haiz.. honestly i deprove a lo... k la.. dear l love u muack.. gtg..

2006-01-14T06:18:00.000-08:00

hey backie..
how you guys been?? updated me k... this few daes was wit my dear and weihao.. lol.. my dear went wit me and my mum to chinatown.. lol.. so funny sia my mum chat with her.. den my dear gana scare.. coz my mum sae all my bad point.. den she was like diao la.. lol..den my uncle also talk 2 her lo.. very cute la...

den we cum my huse practise teh band song also... very hard to train but reali hope can go in la... i can c la.. everyone trying their best.. my cousin muz cum train rite after school.. weihao duno the chinese words but also try to read...dear muz try to combine the voice wit us probably..tht y la..

then todae was sat lo.. got the superband thingy... i went to c wit my dear and my cousin.. then the ppl was gd la.. the one of them got two ppl de.. their own song is wad they sing la.. den one of them song like zhang zhi chen which is malay la.. den another guy sound like lin jun jie lo... very power la.. but hope my band can go in and know more frend.. kk.. tht all ba..

2006-01-10T06:37:00.000-08:00

hey backie...

here to update about my life..
nowadays no time go gym training.. lol.. maybe will gain fat abit la.. but hope nt too much la.. nowadays mostly go out is wit my dear lo.. den sumtimes with hao and my cousin.. rarely go out wit my frend like OL gang and my redhill frend....LOL..

maybe ba.. till sumtimes u will hang out with the few frends that will b much more closer to you lo..den til the dae.. onli u and ur wife/husband.. is life this way? maybe ba.. thats y i much more treasure my dear lo..lol.. xiao zhu i nv sae u cant contact weihao ar.. sae til like i restrict sia.. maybe he juz nt clear yet la..k?

lemme talk about tkd.. last sat nv c mi go black belt de grading rite? very wierd? wont la.. i dun wan no confidence.. den go there fail.. i muz sae i m very poor in my sparing and pattern.. feel so useless la..but trying hard.. this is wad i told my dear lo... i after training she come and massage for me.. she like gosh.. but i know you care for me la.. LOL..ya anyway now i in sport team and in a cc name unity CC.. very nice sia the name... but quite pro la e kicks.. different from school de.. ya.. madam keep asking me in sparing time use the front leg.. dun keep using the back leg lo.. LOL.. den i like wanna fall lo. this thursdae still got training sparing.. 30min sparing.. LOL.. 1 vs 4.. i one person sia.. so sad... but gd training..lol.. ya anyways.. TKD mate.. pray tht i can go higher nitec.. den i will go school.. lol.. can teach u all some side steps.. ya ppl like vanessa, suyu ma,kelvin pa, ah loong and weihao.. i can teach u all by then i hope lol..

dear.. thanks for cuming my huse.. i know sumtimes i tend to neglect you.. but i try not to.. our band can de.. b live ourself.. k?and dun drink too much k? remember take ur pay.. remember take ur medicine.. dun always go hme so late.. dun put tattoo liao k? den try to exercise more k? very naggy hor... but the things mention above are important.. lol.. k la.. love you ping dear.. muack..

2006-01-08T22:57:00.000-08:00

hee... back to update blog since xiao zhu ask me to...

xiao zhu juz wanna tell u u dun need to do things til like dis de la.. k??

this few daes keep going out with my dear.... ma they all celebrate bd wit dad.. but i cant go coz got spring cleaning.too bad lo... den dear ask me out i also cant so sad... den on sundae which is yesterdae... i bring her go cut her hair.. but like nv cut sia.. den we go walk walk.. she hold my hand so tight sia.. so touching..aCTUALLI yesterdae got saw her liao.. at bugis.. den she wit her frend..den todae wanna train singing wit hao de..but he went sentosa den summore raining dunno go der for wad sia.. hai...

den after cut hair i bring her to my frend mama de huse dye hair.. auntie very cute sia keep asking her dye more colour.. but the outcome she very pretty.. lol..then while waiting 4 her turn i was playing game.. den neglect her la.. den she quite angry and sad.. den i in e end going hme wit her den reliease.. lol.. so toot and gong.. no wonder she call me gong.. lol.. but we went to macpherson eat at around 9pm wit my dad and ma... lol... den she like very nervous sia..LOL..ya lo tht all lo.. ani wae.. superband on sat and sun de... we goin on sun.. lol.. cum support k?

2006-01-03T06:30:00.000-08:00

hee... backie

yesterdae was 2nd of jan 2006... yoyo... second dae of 2006 worx... went out wit my dear.. i ask her cum my huse first coz i wanna do sumthin first.. den she at my huse try 2 zz.. den i disturb her til she cannot zzz.. lol.. OB.. but i manage to sae the three words to her...

after that i recieve an msg frm my gan ma... saying that gan pa bd is on fridae but i cant go coz i got to do spring cleaning. paint the wall... do a lot of messy thing la.. so cant go.. papa dun saddie k? i still wish u happi happi birthdae k!!

ya back to my dear.. den we go marina square... she never go ritz calton b4.. so i bring her go lo.... she sae the toilet very hard to use.. i sae if soft de den si liao..LOL.. but she mean she cant understand hw to use la..LOL.. den the whole building was so High class la.. gosh man...

den we went marina square.. was very cold there.. den i was sleeveless.. den dear hug me very close.. sae she gimme warmness.. i was like.. i heard b4 boi hug gal nv gal hug boi de wor..den she laugh.. she went to the jap de fast food de place eat... LOL...den i was like so stranger there la.. LOL..

we frm marina square walk to bugis.. we past the NLB.. den was like wanna go in but dear nv go libarary de so i sae dat next time den go.. she ask if i wanna go izit? den go lo.. but i dun wan.. anyway tis is e first time my dear so understandin la i mean none of ex will lidat lo..

den the whole dae was very lovin la.. but on e way i call kelvin my gan pa.. i ask if he waiting for ma nt lo.. if yes den i can go pei him la.. but he n ma at PS shopping so. i think dun disturb them lo.. den i also wish him bd la..

dats all lo.. the countdown celebartion at vanessa huse was nice.. yea?? love u all OL gang

2005-12-30T22:37:00.000-08:00

hey... going new year le wor... hope my frend all can have their wishes come true...
people like mai sei, suyu, carol,shiyun,charlene,shinhui,vanessa,kelvin,weihao,ah loong,wei xiang,another wei hao and my dear dear ping... hee... realli love her alot...

todae she work from 11am to 1am.. sure very tired de.. den she still wanna stay overnite at downtown east.. den i allow her ba.. cos is countdown.. den i cannot pei her.. den.. dun control her lo...also miss her cos around 6 days nv saw her lidat liao.. realli miss her la..

i still ask her if she love me... she sae yes.. i was like very happy lo and will treasure her lo.. i thinking of buying a rose and a love shaped cake to let her happy.. but the thing is i dun dare give...LOL... i may b cum ah beng again la.. but.. to her i still will be gentle to her.. hope our love will last..

2005-12-28T07:07:00.000-08:00

hee.. updating blog lo....

todae went out to weihao house... and found out that he quite fan la.. so all i can do is give him a listening ear lo... listen to all of his problem...my ex ar.. angela... like him wor.. and also one of my frend like him.. but actually if weihao know who he like den he wont fan le.. den i go bring my dear to work lo... den my cousin with weihao.. they went play BB while i went to my dear house... bring her go work at downtown east..den while on the bus.. i keep disturbing her den kiss her... den she finally kiss me.. wooot... so touched wor.. finalli kissed me.. but she sae she kissed me den no more bubble tea... but nvm la.. anywae she got kissed me i very happy le lo.. haha... den around 7 reach weihao huse.. saw them playing chess.. den i lose to weihao.. honestly weihao gd at games.. but nt at books.. but also not computer cos he simply is computer Nerd..LOL..

ya.. den i also saw max.. he also at weihao huse lo..den we were practising the song we wanna sing at the superband.. den i was thinking will we go in?.. aiya.. dun wan think so much le lo...
den i thinking abt the countdown thingy... my dear woirk from 12pm to 12am.. den i was like dunno wanna go where? summore i have PBT muz 10.30pm reach home lo...dats y very blur lo.. so frends.. i realli hope u all can early meet up or sumthing?? den go walk walk shop shop..if cant den nvm la..

yeah.. den was like missing my dear so much la.. coz we around 1 month sayin we like each other.. but she nv kiss me b4 la.. den wait for so long she onli slight touch my mouth onli den i was like so high la.. den my frend jin guan call me.. he was like asking me my phone number got change anot and also ask me how m i?? den he gv me a big surprises la.. HE GOING NS LE.realli sad..den i was feelin all my frend left me le.. except weihao.. so sad sia.. den summore wei hao also have his own frend le.. the most suay is i tio PBT..haiz...so sad..

Weihao aka brother
Wei hao.. i hope u dun stress la.. u muz make very sure hu u like first den can go steady... dun sae u dun wan fall in love liao.. i also hope u one dae can find ur true love.. but it realli takes time...

Jin guan
u going NS le.. den i more cant c u liao... althou after that ITE meeting i saw u onli.. but in my heart i realli think of u as a gd frend...

Ah lai...
yo.. u r a elder brother to me.. everytime i dunno de thing u will help me.. realli thanks a lot..

ah loong..
also misss u.. u my ah gong.. that dae saw u ..wow realli you fu le... muz b you fu but nt so fu la..k

yengling aka airpork
hey hw u sia.. long time nv suan u.. very sian de.. everytime go tiong bahru will think of u coz there de roast pig is the most famous de.. lol...

Suyu aka ah ma..
hey.. how u and pa le... hope u two doing well la.. k.. anythin or wanna go out can call me.. k?

2005-12-11T23:47:00.000-08:00

i am back everyone....

long time never see the OL gang...
sorry man... e first meeting i cant go.... this few daes after nv work le... realli very vexed lo... keep quarreling wit my parent... dunno y til nw i still dun understand them lo.... hai...
then nw i keep finding work... but all the work is too far and pay too low den my mum dun like lo... haiz... even zouk i also quit le.... haiz.... yesterdae then go out with wei hao my brother, my cousin, my ah gong ah loong and weisiang lo...quite fun la.. we go play lan at cineleisure den quite cheap la 2 mi... den i go find my cousin sis at cineleisure... den she work as the neoprint de lo.. den quite ex la.. one photo $10... i rather use my phone take a shot of myself free de summore.. LOl...

den now wanna tok about this la...
den is this girl that i like lo...
hee PING AH... LOL.... i noe i realli no use la... everytime suan u..... make fun of u.... den when u sad i also dunno how to an wei you lo.. but juz wanna let you know i realli love u... maybe you will sae i will change target very fast... quite true la.. but nw no le... onli u understand wad i wan and wad i need... i may not noe how to express myself gd enuff... but i hope u know my heart... u e onli one hor to realli knw hw 2 secure my heart sia.. no wonder hello kitty always hold the heart sia... den i juz hope u dun always go home so late la.. althou i go home much more later den u la.. LOL... but u cant lidat wor.. u gal gal leh.. k.. den i promise wont smoke le... btw i 3 weeks nv smoke liao leh... LOL... and ya... i dun care how he hurt u in the past la.. i wanna tell you how love shud b lo... and hopefully will replace him in ur heart... but i noe its difficult.. but i try i try i try... zai ai 200 nen wo ye bu hui fang qi... know? hee... wo zhi xi wang wo men hui yi zhi zhou xia qui...

Wei hao
i hope you will find ur love one la... coz i heard ping sae you like like one your school mate ar?
muz jia you k.. and muz know when to b serious and not to b lame la... k?? sen hope our band will success la...

Wei siang
dun b hurt liao k? time will heal everything... sad too long will grow old de.. den like me like dat... onli 17 den ppl sae i like 29.. so sad k??

suyu aka ah ma
ah ma ah ma... muz jia you k.. i reali believe that you and ah pa will last... but the most difficult period is yet to cum lo which is the NS period.. muz strive on k? jia you

Shin hui. lao mei
mei ah... glad dat u ok le la... sorri kor tis few daes finding job so no time to pei u la.. but u muz take care k? and muz buy bubble gum 4 mi k?

angeline er mei
muz jia you i nv contact u coz i buzi but i wan u to take care k.. we together jia you...

and last might be the first i leave this msg 2 u... but whether u will c it a not i still dunno

been 2 years le.. since we last hold hand... but juz wanna tell u... i finalli forget u totalli le... alica..
u hurt me too much... althou wit u de period is very loving and happy.. but e last word you gave to me.. is very hurting, (dun i feel very Bhb to keep holding your hand in front of your frend.) and everyday with you is so scary as well fearing you will go back to him.. but in e end you still go back and told me all along you never love me before.. and was using me to forget him... now i understand... i turn bad because of you.. lose all my frend because of you.. give up my dream of you... and you juz sae this to me.. its alrite.. now that i know how hurting it was.. sorry i was wrong to love you before and wait for you for 2 years... but now my heart is on one gal onli... ping... i love you ...

2005-12-11T23:40:00.000-08:00

hey hey... i am back... back to update my new rap i been writing on...

yoyo... bitch there.... here slut here... fuck it...

bitch been down and up never does it.... fuck it when you sae no no fuck man...
i been up and down and never been there... suck my dick as i fucking useless for i think... i try every way every inch but never get prown...
my singing suck never fuck up.. thou u will gimme a chance but never know you still put me down to the bin.. i try to penetrate in your presence.. but whoes know...

bitch up down down down down... here where my lyrics?? bitch down up up up up
gimme my lyrics you fucker ass hole... hee... i am the way i am... i dunno that the way i am...

2005-11-13T10:22:00.000-08:00

hola back again...
dun knw y will abit miss all my frend sia.. mayb coz going 2 leave them 4 a period of time ba.. haiz...
but nvm la.. i noe we will still b together de... hee..
hai.. hope at the end we dun cry lo... dun like shi bu de leave lo..
but we need 2 leave one dae ma...
IS early or late onli ma.. but frend.. remember tht there is tis class called coolster... we muz hold on 2 it k...
i always hope tht we will stay together forever... sista and brota... till we go work rite at nite got ppl can meet up.. like one of the japanese drama la... i very childish rite? but realli lo... i hope one dae we grow up.. we can all go c the stars... and sae out hu we nt happi wit and y?... hai...

tell u all another story lo...

there is this group of frends... they all not mean to meet up.. but one dae they all decide that they form a group... to prevent their things from getting steal by the bad guys... den one dae this bad guy cum... they manage 2 prevent it.. they decide tht no one could join this group...

each person in the group is very different..
1 is very happy go lucky... he would not care if he is sad.. he trys 2 make evryone happy... weakness is that sumtime they find him very annoying..
2 is very quiet.. she is always finding her true love. but when found she will give up eveything for the one she love..
3 is very clever or intelligent... she thinks that frends are very important. she help up 4. they are a close frend. she like to work.. however she try 2 balance work with her studies...
4 is a very self minded girl. but she will try to inform everyone of the importance of everythin. she do not want anyone to join in the group without proper knowing or understanding.she wont think twice about giving her comments.
5 is a very emotional gal.. she try to make people happy. but she is sad.. everyone in the group can feel it. she loves to zzz alot.. but when at midnite ppl in the group cant zzz. she can b contacted.
6 is a very soft spoken gal.. she can b tough at times. but need her frend to b around most of the time. she is scare of being hurt...
7 is a workholic.. she work alot.. she dotes on her stead alot.. but sometime too blur to remember things...
8 is a very useless guy. he has been thru alot.. in regardless of relationship problem, family problem and physical problem... he insist he do things on his own.. but actualli he need his frend.he may look cold but in his mind he been thinking alot.
9 is a quiet girl. she is cute and try to solve their problem in a more fun and easy ways. but she is quite blur.
10 help 9 along.. they give each other guidng lights on where 2 go.. they truley love each other.
11 love 4. he will give everything 2 her regardless of wat. in his heart as long as 4 is happy he is happy.

all this make them stay together... pointing out each other weakness and strength. prevent the bad guy 2 invade their precious thing... do u know wat is this thing??

IT is a ship called" FRIENDSHIP"

2005-11-10T23:20:00.000-08:00

this is the group i like "S"

2005-11-10T06:03:00.000-08:00

2005-11-10T05:55:00.000-08:00

2005-11-10T05:41:00.000-08:00

2005-11-10T05:34:00.000-08:00

2005-11-09T08:23:00.000-08:00

haiz.... one dae past

beachboi ar..... tell u all a story ba... beachboi and a beautiful gal ba... tis beachboi ar... he love the gal so much ar.. but dun dare sae out la... so stupid rite?
beachboi de wishes is she b beautiful. happy.. dun sad and stress le lo... den todae ar... the gal told the beachboi.. she stress, den she still injured herself. the beachboi cried again.... stupid...
(cryin) i dun wanna hide it actualli... everytime c u injure hw much i wish i can care for u.. help u wrapped ur injury... kiss u on e head and tell u dun scare about wadever u might face in the future... i will take care of it lo..

but...

can i ? i dun have the guts 2 tell u le... dun have a clear vision of what future will i have.. do i have the rite 2 love u? dunno... i promise b4 my ex... i wont cry le... but i keep crying 4 u... how i wish i dun fall 4 u.. and b rite back e way i used 2 b... but y muz u appear in my dream?.... hao xiang ni... zhen de hao xiang ni... but i knw u wont miss me a single bit.. i dun wish wad thing.. juz wish u can dun injured urself le... dun hurt urself le..dun stress le..k? i beg u...

I reali love yew alot.. alot...

2005-11-08T06:00:00.000-08:00

sian a dae...
got my ipod nano...
actualli quite sad lo... shit man yesterdae she cried.... but i could not do anything to console her.
she told me because of her studies den she sad... she feel hopeless... but does she know i dun wan her to feel this way? haiz.. blame myself... no courage to tell her...not even just tell her i care for her sia.. den every time she sad i can onli ask her not to b sad... todae call her.. ask her not to cry le..but eddie... u realli no other things 2 sae le meh? haiz... eddie u reali useless...

den i reach hme, my gan mei, hui jun called me 2 ask how m i.. but overall still ok la... when i zzz.. i think of her.. i have this dream again... she cried.. den i couldnt console her... th story around there la... if its true wad she sae.. nightmare normally is true while dream are e opp of reality.. den let me have nightmare ba.. at least can c u.. and its true lo...

2005-11-01T22:24:00.000-08:00

aiya yo... everyone nw u can called me~~ beach boi

todae have sparing with ah loong my ah gong. den quite fierce lo...
but juz training him and myself...
den my leg quite pain den his hand pain... but ah loong jia you u quite gd..
erm.. den todae have quite a gd dae wit all my frend lo...
but inside got sumthing bothering me...

do i love her?? or juz tht i care for her...
dunno when i saw her i have the feeling of wanna avoiding her...
dunno dun have this feeling before...
but my crane ok le... going 2 gv u
but i dunno how 2 tell u...
juz dun wan u get stress 2 much

2005-10-26T19:51:00.000-07:00

....
another dae...
went school den they all complain to mi... how the TKD thingy...
ah long injury his pelvis bone there...
ma.. she injuries her stomach...
wei hao injured dunno where.. his mole ba...
den pa his mouth... hai...
den heard dat wei kang whack joel til very cham.
hai...
luckily nv go.. but i go sport teams... hope can cum back and become better... training is super tough... but nvm.. i try my best de... every day muz wear 5kg weight on each leg and run.. but if go school training den no need.. haiz...

todae 1am lidat.. online... den tok 2 her...
she told me abt ah long de things...
very cute sia she.. lol...
den she also told me she psycho bin yuan abt joanne and him... cute sia...
wad i dun like is she always sae she wanna gv up on her studies..
den i told her she gv up i quit school...
which is true la..
onli lidat den she wont gv up lo... hai..

den in e end cant zzz...
den... fold the crane lo.. lol.. hope she like it la...
den miss her alot.. but she zzz ma..
she tired... den gana ah long scare.. so let her go have night mare ba...
dun call her lo...

2005-10-26T09:33:00.000-07:00

....yesterdae angela call mi... ask me for a chat...
can i sae no??
til half her frend call...
she told me next time den chat wit me..
how i hope she wont call mi le... everytime heard her voice.. i will still think of the past.
so i decide..
not to think of the past le...
dont care le...
den todae go school... my groin area hurt a lot... den decide not 2 go TKD...
actualli got other reason de...
den todae c ah long so stress and fed up..
getting a fight... hai...
den she told me she quite scare of ah long.. coz he very fierce...
hai... dunno y i also very angry....
ah long call her leh... i was so fed up actualli.... but hai nvm le lo... past le.

ya my cranes...
268 mores to go...
hope she will like it lo... k la...
god blessed everyone...

weihao...
not i dun wan tok 2 u... is mayb u knw too much of mine things and angela de things.. den i very scare of u...when u tok 2 mi.. i realli very scare u will remind me of her lo...
suyu ma...
ma... sori this few daes i like very fuk lidat... and hope u and pa will last k?? althou u nv sae out but can c u like pa alot.
kelvin pa
i may like her alot... but when i think of i got n0thing 2 gv her... wad 4?? i wan b like ah long... can at least provide the one i like with things...everyday miss her can heard her voice i enuff le...
shin hui mei...
u and david ar... jia you k.
make it last... about ur paper carnes.. jiayou...
angeline
hey... dun think 2 much i ok... cd next time gv u..but do u listen hip hop?

2005-10-26T08:36:00.000-07:00

this is one of the sng i wish 2 sing if i go into the channel U de project superstar next year.

2005-10-21T22:02:00.000-07:00

actually i went home around 11plus. at night
i still thinking of her after the esplande things...
den i begin folding paper crane..
as i fold..
i been thinking y i do so much..
if till that dae i gv her..
she throw away how?
365 cranes.... my support 4 u 365 dae everydae and hours.
but will u accept my support?
i been thinking...
y r u so stress?
y do u wanna pressure urself?
will u take care of urself?

i dono

i juz knw...
i wanna take care of u..
wanna share ur problem..
wanna ease ur stress..
wanna ask u not 2 pressure urself..
wanna bring u 2 my fav place 2 tell u how much i love u
wanna bring u 2 a place which can smother u..

as i think of tis....

teaRS flow down of my chin

y i juz don hav the courage to tell u i dun wan u stress...
dun wan u 2 tired urself til lidat....
hate myself..
hate myself that i cant lighten ur burden...
i realli wish 2 lighten ur burden...
and.. i really wanna b wit u...
as long as my life end...
i love u

2005-10-21T21:47:00.000-07:00

romantic.......

todae meet pa and ma play badminton....
den ah long had a tiff with ah ma...
den he nv cum...
actually all along i been thinking of her...
thinking why she so stress...
den after badminton we went compass point makan...
den meet ah long...
actually meet at far east...
den i think esplande is better...
den we went there...
really very night view there lo...
but she nv come... too bad
den i msg her...
she sound so stress........ den my face also not so happy le.. y she need 2 b so stress?? dunno.. dun wish 2 see her lidat...
den ah gong tell mi about wad happen between him and ah ma...
den i light a cigg...
actualli the real reason of me not jioing her is because i cant totally forget my ex..
yes i may think of her stress.. her pressure that she undertake... her problem.. her wish...
but i will think of what my ex done 2 me.. and sae 2 me.. haiz.... useless arite..
ah gong then tell mi dun think 2 much.

guess what ...
we saw censorsed thing at the rooftop.. people kissing.. and petting and all sort of gross things.lol... den i faster sae lets go. as we go down.. ah gong brought the hageen daz de ice cream.
den i sae i don wan.. in my mind, this is wat going on," see people can afford a haggen daz ice cream, can u?? wat if she want? can u buy?'' the answer is,"i will rather hunger 2 death den let her suffer."haiz... but... does she know?

2005-10-12T02:56:00.000-07:00

gan ma.
ma.. how r u?... althou sumtimes pa is protective.. but i think all guys r around the same de lo... but at least pa dotes on u... so muz treasure lo.. den.. erm.. dun think too much lo.. k??
gan pa..
pa... how r u?.. erm.. see u very dote on ma. i very envious. pa.. thank u 4 helping me so much when i need sumone 2 b there. althou ma sumtimes bad temper. but she is hard on outside soft inside.. lol.. k pa.. jia you.
ah gong...
ah gong ar.. dun b so hot temper. i noe u change a lot. but ur way of speaking still very harsh. muz change k. i rather i die than my frend got trouble lo. know? anythin can tell me.. i support u. u treat ah ma very gd lo.. till i very envious there is a guy so gd lo.. feel dat i useless liao lo..
lao mei...
mei ar.. he going NS liao. treasure the times together. dun make each other saad liao.. sumtimes u muz zhu don k?
hao..
hao.. we been brother so long.. thank u.. everytime i sad u try 2 make me happy but in e end i scold u.. sorry.. but dun sae lame joke le k?
]
2 my frends.. i love u all... thanks

2005-10-11T23:09:00.000-07:00

Gan ma

this few weeks i seen u with pa so much time. he realli cares 4 u thou sumtimes he is too protective of u. which i think is normal 4 a boi 2 b like tis. but muz try 2 understand. coz sumtimes bois will get jealous easily. never let go.. u 2 i think can last.

anyway.. very happy 2 b ur gan er zi.. but realli own pa n u alot.

Gan Pa

pa althou sumtimes ma got attitude lidat. but u shud noe la. she outside hard inside soft lo. den sumtime i also feel u too protective of her liao. thanks when i need help u will b there. althou u restricted me 2 smoke but sumtime i still smoke.. realli very stressed caught between this 3 gals lo....i rather tell u den tell the gals coz they wont knw what we bois doing ma... but pa.. muz treat ma gd gd which i think u have.. pa.. jia you k.. take another TKD gold and let tht fuking fabian c.. k??

Hao

hao... brothers.. althou sumtimes u hurt me.. i hurt u... but u still my brother.. dun always sae lame things... ppl will find it annoying de.. thanks alot of what u done 4 me.. when i mood bad u have to b my trunks 4 mi 2 scold and fed up wit.. but i knw sumtimes u trying 2 make me happy.. but.. very sorri.. sumtimes hurt u alot.

Shin hui
meimei... hee.. see u got ur right guy... muz jia you 2 keep ur guy.

sumtimes he is too worri about u.. but muz let him knw u ok de..

its is right that he will be worri, summore he going 2 NS le. den dun quarrel le noe? he loves u alot. i think u do also.. so.. dun quarrel k??

2005-09-24T09:20:00.001-07:00

yesterday,
celebrate carol birthday. den i ren one ma one pa one ah ma and one ah gong. lol... den as i company they all go take pay. my brain is thinking of her. but nv sae out. frends when u all c i biting can. i m thinking of her. not i like 2 bite.

we meet at bugis at 4.30. but my ma late. den my ah gong ah ma also. haiz, den suddenly as i shop i saw e coffin de handphone pouch. den i think of her again. i remember i told her if one dae i got enuff money i will buy that 4 her. but nw? den i keep looking at the coffin handphone pouch til i saw e cigg box. den i think back thats once i m very angry coz she smoke alot. den til she dun wan eat. den thinking back, will she listen 2 me?

i dunno y i keep thinkin of her. hai. den we go marina bay 2 eat. den quite a lot of ppl la. den i go take a puff and tell my ah gong my prob. haiz. so wad e use? i still keep thinking of her. den they chat chat, and i suddenly think back that dae at chalet. den see my ah gong ah ma, papa mama. i realli wanna turn back the clock where i hug her, and stay at that time forever.but i knw its impossible.

when i went home i call pearl, i mean she call mi 2 chat. but in e end i make her sad, coz of my missing her, sorry pearl.
http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y200/Jeassea/my%20other%20pics/wp5_800.jpg

2005-09-21T09:01:00.000-07:00

todae TKD very shiok... manage 2 learn some of my pattern. happi sia.
den got sparring, finalli spar wit my dream guy. daniel. but he nv spar real de so sad. honestly he quite hard to fight.den my body hurt alot. cos spar plus gym work out yesterday.
this few daes still crying.. still miss her lo. haiz dunno when can gv up.
den my heart quite confuse lo. scare will fall for the wrong gal.. anyway b coz wei hao de words. he sae when sum1 lose a love one will eventually more easy to fall in love again. so b coz of wat he sae. i realli muz think thru lo. dun wan another mistake. sumtime i feel cant rush sumtim reali confused. haiz...

suyu
u found ur love one treasure it k. as ur sis. i dun wan u 2 b sad. so b happi k?? not i dun like her la.. is juz that not sure yet. i dun wan hurt ppl. den 4 nw i wan treat her gd. but dunno y when i c her sian sian i will wanna tok 2 her lo.. i onli wanna know her better 4 now. and if she is e gal den i will choose her de. and try 2 forget my ex lo... sumtime realli dunno if i use her 2 replace my e or wat. i dun wanna hurt her feeling lo. k??

mai sei
dun worry, althou i change. but i still regard u all as my frend lo... hai.. try my best le.. sumtimes my attiutude bad dun blame me k?

weihao
thanks 4 wat u done.. we as bro try to help each other k?

xinhui
if u likehim juz go. xin fu zai ni shou zhong. k?? anything can tell kor

pearl
sorry make u angry last nite. erm, sori sori still frend rite?? hee.. my milktea ar

vanessa(aka jeassea aka zhu dou aka mao dou)
u ar.. muz try to catch up mentally k?? er... dat boi i think not worth ur frend la.. k.. den next time b gentle a little bit more can?? den i wont so scare u. ang mo ghost, anyway, er... any prob tell mi k.. wish our cafe can realli cum true k?

2005-09-19T07:55:00.000-07:00

hey hey... todae went 2 james huse sing. produce le wei hao new song. quite ok la.. mayb is my drum beat not gd enuff... hai, den james not himself todae. like got problem lidat,den everi1 have some prob lo.

Pearl:
if u have prob tell me. i may not b able to understand or even know. but i dun wanna c u sad, as u my frend, c u sad i also not happy. if u cry again b cos of him. not worth it lo. understand. u told me to na de qi fang de xia. u muz also k?

suyu:
to me i realli dono how 2 choose. i own very blur le. between they three. hai. den he also nw so close 2 mi. den i dono wad 2 do. i wan they 2 together. but, haiz... i dono how 2.

2005-09-16T09:00:00.000-07:00

todae went 2 school giv pearl e poster. but they until 10 den cum. den pearl face whole black black de. from snow white to justice bao . lol... den i help her paste le.. give her e gift i wrapped 4 her.FOUND OUT SOMETHING WOR, i no taste when choosing gift for gals.lol...

den go class le cum down. saw she sell most of the product quite happy lo. dunno y see she happy i also happy in e heart . lol...den company her awhile. den go james huse. over there saw his drum.

i was so attracted 2 the drum i sitted there nv cum out of the seat sia. den we help wei hao a lot of song. den james ask me smoke wit him den i pei him. he tell mi all his prob.den i ask him try 2 forget lo.. hai.. so sad.

reach home le. call pearl ask if she like the present den suddenly miss her again. den keep crying. but when pearl ask i sae nv hai. so useless.

2005-09-16T08:49:00.000-07:00

hey.,.. todae quit a good dae.. ask xin hui pei me go sembawang eat. den meet lincoln. he got into sum trouble.. we go S21 2 eat. over there got ppl wanna beat me.. but rite now dun dare touch me... XIAO MATT cum straight 2 me. if u dare.

lincoln anyway got there at 6.30pm. me and xinhui go shop at SSC. for the project and the poster i promised pearl. den at 6.30 we go over S21. eat there, smoke there drink there. lincoln lie 2 e auntie sae he 18 and buy a calsberg 2 drink, and a cigg to share wit me.. but i still thinking of her.

shin hui told me alot of trouble she has. den i bo bian ask her lean on my shoulder. haiz.. poor gal.... haiz... den i also told her my prob lo... haiz

2005-09-14T08:32:00.000-07:00

another dae... hai yesterdae call her to check on her. hai. very weird. brk le.still hold on 2 tis relationship like a fool lidat. dunno when can totally forget her. hai.

todae was late 4 school. saw fernades. den i remember meeting pearl. den i saw fernades stead. den i ask pearl if reach school dun cum cafeteria. hai dunno i wori so much 4 wat. but when pearl reach she went out le.. hai.. wori 4 nth. den i company her a while den go up 2 class.

wei hao sick le.. so sad my bro sick liao.. den he sae wanna style hair. but so sori dat i company pearl den i forget 2 help u.linda borrow hp from me. den when during the OIT lesson. my head super pain lo. den i walk out straight from the class ignoring wad teacher sae. dunno ... mayb 2 miss her ba. so fan. den meet pearl and linda 2 take back my phone. den went 2 pearl huse. see she make the chocolate de bag so xin ku. lol.. zhen ke lian. hai. den took 2 pic of her. one like ghost and one like ah ma. lol... but first time see her so yong gong.

now chatting wit her, she reminded me sumthing. when i company her go east point. we walk past this bangalow. den the dog keep barking. i thou it bark at hu. den i saw its eyes. guess wat.. it was looking at pearl. den i psycho her. dat the dog look like her. den, e dog tiam tiam liao. i guess the dog also think so. dats y keep looking at her . so mayb pearl u shud think of adopting a dog. that look like u.

but 2 serious, dunno y tis few daes so sad.. hai.. guess its time i start my life afresh ba.. dunno.. here sae but mind still thinking of her. anyway.. thanks evryone... friday NAFA.. buaiz

2005-09-13T05:47:00.000-07:00

hey yo... todae was quite a nice dae, went 2 school for S n W. den wear whole addidas uniform go. den after that meet pearl and linda 2 go eat. eat buffet or rather sushi. b4 going der den i take a stick of cigg from lincoln. den he keep psychoing pearl saying she very short. den pearl sae he not very tall. aiya they 2 ar... hai.. den linda keep asking xinhui(lao mei) about she n david. den i tiam tiam. pearl also. hai... dun care le not my problem. lol..

den reach TPI den lincoln go take 969 go back. he ask mi got time go sembawang play LAN. not i dun wan but is i scare i saw her lo.. hai. try. den when i reach TPI i introduce lincoln 2 david. den david go out with xinhui. den mi and pearl plus linda. hai, ya.. i think fridae got NAFA, 2.4. muz train le. dun wan fail again. lol..

pearl, i think she quite angry and sad coz yesterdae she ask mi go i tell her not confirm. but pearl ar.. i still got go ar.. still got eat ar. lol.. but hope u happi la. k? hee i dun wan u sad leh.kee.. btw ya. den we go hougang mall eat. suki sushi. quite nice. hee.. linda keep eating none stop. b4 went in linda call hao. he quite sick so nv cum nvm lo. den eat alot. den i keep eyeing the octopus. lol.
in e end got 2 eat it.. so xin fu

den we went 2 k box. every song i sing de, lol.. but e song i like most is the hei you lun de"ling" and wilber de"bu de bu ai" very nice, especially pearl sing the bu de bu ai. hee pro le lo... lol...
hee.. i tink or rather i feel she quite happy lo. but reali waste a lot of money. lol.. after going out with them. i went 2 shop. 4 wat neh?? hehe.. pearl de present lo... i want 2 buy tis ting which is $56. but i scare latr she knw sure scold me de.. hai.. so i finalli stop at 1 that is $45. lol... but i think i gonna buy another thing that ah long suggest.. lol... SECRET!!! lol.. siao.. k la buaiz

(weihao_aka_bro1)
wish u faster recover and lemme psycho. dun wori le.. i try 2 settle myself k??
(pearl_aka_special one)
lol... happi birthdae la.. no cake mooncake can?? no mooncake chocolate cake can??
stay happy k and stay cute like toilet k?

2005-09-10T22:59:00.000-07:00

2005-09-10T22:30:00.000-07:00

fuck that... i am back!!!! its been a hard day... i was hacked two slashed but luckily not so deep.. my frend was beating til he cant walk. i was wonderful.... whoo!! whoo!! one on ten leh but as i was fighting i still was thinking of her. haiz... nvm wait lo... but i m grate 2 b back. cut my hair which is a muz thing. den tml going back class.. but stll thinking of her lo... den sumtimes think of that stupid pearl. hai... den think of my brother, wei hao. hai... luckily can cum back. gd enuff my hair short.

when i cum bac.. i first one 2 call is her. guess what, she sae i nv die ar?? my heart like the mirror brk brk brk til siao..hai heart die liao la... y she cant make me happi 4 a while de? hai.. reali need me 2 beg her meh?

sumtimes i feel dat my frend r more like stead 2 me. i rather dun wan sad. but can i help? hai... sian...

(wei hao_aka_bro1)
THANKS A LOT. ur mei de thing u no need worry. i nv like her.
(mai sei)
sorry 4 letting u worry
(carol)
its been a while since we talk le.
(xinhui_aka_lao mei)
anythin tell kor k. dun fan le, kor nw still can take alot of thing so better one shot all come k.

(STEVEN)

thanks 4 an wei me, i try my best.

(david)

mayb u sae is correct. its urs its ur.. ty

2005-09-09T08:45:00.000-07:00

todae was quite a gd dae.. yesterdae fainted. cos oversick... so useless...
nw at thailand... very sian. here very spooky... likely gt blog. but still tinkin of her. why she nv msg back.
nvm.. mayb 1 dae i can gv her up.. this few daes make wei hao very ma fan. b coz of her mei de dai ji.. hai.. all my fault, if i nv msg her in e 1st place den nth will happen le.. hai.. all my fault.. feel that i done a lot of wrong things.
todae pei ah mei(xin hui) go cut hair... den saw her wit david like wat lidat.. hai.. cant understand.. i even cant understand myself la.. lol...
(weihao_aka_bro1)
sorry make u so ma fan and moody.... hai... very sori...
(xin hui_aka_ah mei)
if u feel he is not e one den keep 2 urself. if u like him juz go k.
(mai sei)
thanks 4 making me laugh
(pearl_aka_special 1)
e oreo is not enuff... still got more milk tea...
(carol)
dun always nv cum school i will miss u de.
(shiyun)
ah long very gd le... u can actually tell him what u dun like abt him n ask him try 2 improve lo... no one is prefact de ma.

2005-09-08T07:39:00.000-07:00

hai.. another day. todae late for school. but actualli i dun care la.. this few daes very moody. keep thinking of her... but no use. let her cool down... i dunno how long. i juz noe i keep on waiting , and one dae i will totally broke down. todae wei hao ask mi not 2 be too close to her mei(ah qi). quite right la... everytime c her will think of (her). todae keep thinking of her lo.. so foolish of me. den at VSM i was so engrossed at what teacher isdoing and teaching that i forget that i still miss her. teacher give us a brk. den i ask xn hui mei to come and pei me. den i zz at her shoulder. then suddenly dream of her. dream of those beautiful momment but suddenly sae she wanna leave me. den i wake up and cried. ha.. so useless.. todae saw pearl. ask her pei me go co-op. she ask if i smoke. i cant deny. den i sae i treat her sweet. den afternoon sae mr khoo. ask him 2 treat me chicken rice which he did. den go pe. while running, keep thinking of her. if she is alrite. hai.. k la.. gtg...
(wei hao_ aka_bro1)
sorry let u have so much ma fan. everytime cant help u but make u fan, wori and sad. very sorri.. about me and her de dai ji u dun care le k??
(mai sei)
thanks 4 helping me... i beginning 2 trust u
(carol)
not i dun see u as brother le. but u have ur thing 2 fan. so i dun wan u fan more le k?
(pearl_aka_special one)
u own me milk tea. it takes forever 2 return like dat leh
(xin hui_aka_lao mei)
dun let ppl mistaken le. u shud get wad i mean. i will try not 2 b sad. but i dunno when. thanks 4 companying me,
(suyu)
i know u r trying to help me. i knw ur heart. but sumtimes i dun wan de thing tends 2 happen.

2005-09-06T07:40:00.000-07:00

todae start school at 10am. wake up see my ma fuking black face. dunno what i done wrong. i wake up. bath le. go out of huse. first thing is called wei hao. b cos last few daes companying me he veri tired. scared he cant wake up. i call him he wake up le lucky... den reach school, take attendance. but teacher nv cum. nvm lo. i ask shin hui, suyu, shi yun and mai sei wanna run not? den we run 1 round and feel my speed reali increases. so all the training at gym reali pay off lo. so happi. den shin hui help hao 2 make blog. quite nice. hao happi ma?? den we decided 2 go play badminton. den i msg qi wanna meet not. she meet us at TIC. den she sae she wanna pirece hole. den i bring her go ah long de jie shop 2 pirece. den hao scare his ma will scold den i sae anything i undertake it lo. den go hao huse play mahjong. hee.. fun lo... den hao buy carrot cake 4 us 2 eat. den c ah qi sad sad moody de. den while on e way go hme. den i ask her wad happen. den as i guess. she miss her ex also. hai.. c her lidat i very sad also. den also miss my ex. around 8pm she msg me wat i doin. ask mi dun go thailand. but i have 2 go lo. pretending 2 b strong in front of her. hai... den msg qi ask her wat she doing?? den she sae she wan pirece another hole. but i sae cannot, hope she listen la. k la.. all take care.

2005-09-06T07:15:00.000-07:00

another dae. ya todae was quite great la. everyone happi.i juz wan my frends 2 be happi. ppl like wei hao, carol, yengling, wei xiang, shin hui and suyu. shi yun and ah qi. althou i still thinking of her but whats the point? my heart keep telling me there's more to the story. i dun wanna hear anybody to sae. i want her to sae her own lo. stubborn hor? anyway. todae wei hao go century square to cut hair including yengling and suyu. they went 2 e store named STORM. den i decided to ask shin hui to pei me go shop shop c c. we went to the singing store where we can record our own ablum. but too bad, i lack the courage. but next year if got tis type of competition i sure go de. den wei hao cut hair hao le. quite nice. but without styling den not nice lo. hee... den he company me go walk when we come to tis arcade. i saw that ZEN MICRO which i like a lot. hee.. den i waste $5 to ask wei hao help mi play. truely tis bro very gd. he let my heart pump til siao but nv get it. den we went to his huse 2 sing song. den thts when i knw ah qi got flu. hee.. den we sing and i ask ah qi 2 join. overall we quite happi. til i ask vanessa 2 sing a song which i like. thts when suyu cried and i secretly cried. worst still i sing wilber pan de wo lan ni zhou le. den think of her again haiz.. anyway guys, thank you we have a nice dae

frends...

2005-09-04T11:56:00.000-07:00

this few daes been thru a lot... all tis while been hurt. i always think there is sumtin more 2 e story. hope u can tell mi 1 dae. but nw, i will hav 2 wait. while waiting try 2 open my heart. i dun wan it 2 b a shadow in me. while missing i will find sumthin 2 do. u r hurt, me too. we share e pain. but as frend. leaving u was e toughest thing. but what can i do? if u b wit me u will get hurt den i rather myself being hurt den u. hope u will b happy.
(carol)
i think u noe my heart. thanks for being there, i noe u try 2 force me 2 face it bravely. but u shud noe i takes time.i will try my best.
(wei hao_aka_ brother 1)
hao, frm all, i need 2 thank u deeply. u help me alot. making it seems 2 be ur prob. making urself as sad as me. sori. i cant face it myself but need 2 pull u down as well. i think i need time. tis few daes u seems sad changed. anythin juz tell mi. i will try my best 2 help.sori 2 make u wori.
(yengling)
u try 2 ask. but sori sumtimes i cant tell much.
(weisiang_aka_close frend 1)
weisiang althou u have ur own prob but u try ur best 2 lend me a listening ear.thanks.i believe our frendship will last. u try 2 lighten my burden by asking me 2 give up. but... i didnt. mayb i sturbborn. anywae thanks.
(pearl_aka_special frend 1)
thanks 4 companying me. listening 2 all my craps. laugh with me. and wori 4 me. u r special enuff le... thanks.. but dun forget my milk tea.
(ah gal_aka_huijun)
ah gal, kor noe ur meaning. kor will try. u muz not turn bad. she is tryin veryhard 2 help u. kor too. anything cum tell kor k?
(steven_aka_clsoe frend 2)
thanks a lot 4 chatting with me althou u have ur own prob. i couldnt help but in turn u help me. thanks. dun gv up k? we jia you together.

everyone. thanks u.

sadness 3

2005-09-03T18:00:00.000-07:00

There's a thousand words that I could say
To make you come home
Oh, seems so long ago you walked away
Left me alone
I remember what you said to me
You were acting so strangeand maybe I was too blind to see
That you needed a change
Was it something I saidTo make you turn away?T
o make you walk out and leave me cold
If I could just find a way
To make it so that you were right here
But right now..I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strongI
've drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains..
You're gone..You're gone..Baby you're goneGirl you're gone, baby girl, you're gone..You're gone..You're...I don't wanna make excuses, baby
Won't change the fact that you're gone
But if there's something that I could do
Won't you please let me know?
Time is passing so slowly now
Guess that's my life without you
and maybe I could change my every day
But baby I don't want to
So I'll just hang aroundand find some things to do
To take my mind off missing you
and I know in my heart
You can't say that you don't love me too
Please say you do
Yeeaah....
I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
I Drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains
You're gone..You're gone..You're goneYou're gone...you're gone.. you're....GoneOhhh...Oh what'll I do
If I can't be with you
Tell me where will I turn toBaby where will I be
Now that we are apart
Am I still in your heart?
Baby why don't you see?
That I need you here with meOohhh...I've been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strong
I've drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remains
Been sitting here
Can't get you off my mind
I've tried my best to be a man and be strongI drove myself insane
Wishing I could touch your face
But the truth remainsYou're gone..You're gone..You're goneYou're goneGoneYou're gone..
But the truth remainsYou're....

sadness 2

2005-09-03T17:26:00.000-07:00

wake up le. but still dun wish to think tht its another dae. wishing everything that happen was bluff.even carol call me. i dun wanna accept the call. i dun wanna accept the fact she brk with me le. what can i do? i stick on the bed till 5pm den stand up. keep laughing but?? in my heart i so sad. i dun wanna let go. can u come back 2 mi? can u take back ur words? can i hold ur hands again. my mind is very blur. i dunno who 2 trust. dunno who to talk 2. u sae u rarely can hug me. but nw? u dun even want 2. i still living in u. keep asking myself what i did wrong. did u ever miss me? can tell me? over the past few weeks. i was hoping you could hold me. when u hold me that dae. it was very close. i told myself after u i could not find another gal le. the hug was so tight that i know its was u that i was looking 4. m i bluffing myself? or i think too much? or m i replacement 4 him. if i was i can b replacement. reading this blog de ppl shud think i very foolish. but i knw my heart is with her. she took my heart away. so much so i dunno what i going 2 do without her. no strength le. thinking of ending my life straight. but i still hope 2 see her. it may hurt. but i m waiting 4 e day she come back and hold my hand. or even rest on my chest. she is e first gal 2 rest on my chest. did u remeber the dae on mrt? u rest on my chest and just doze off lidat. how i hope the time will stop just there. i wrote a song 4 u. but do i have the chance 2 sing it 2 u. i try my best 2 . but... who knows my pain?

sadness

2005-09-03T06:30:00.000-07:00

i was slping. i dream of she and me in a place that nv exist.a place where we can be together forever. my handphone ring. it was a msg from her. the first thing i saw was,"dear can u lemme cool down a while. dun blame urself its not ur fault." my mind went total blank. why? is there a problem between us? i ask what was the problem. she refuse 2 tell me. the third msg was,"can we brk awhile till my n lvl past? i dun wan so much things to fan and worry about. dun call me, just sae can or cant." as a man, i sae no. cos i noe hw important is she to. but? guess what. she sae why cant i understand her and just brk with her. do i have a choice nw? do i? i start to think that i am a burden to her. so much so that i hate myself. i asked if she wanna go home as she is outside and have no money to go home. she sae wan. but when i call her. she dun wan to hear. when i ask why. she sae she scared if she hear my voice she wont bear 2 leave me. but do i bear. i dun wan to brk or even end this relationship at all. but?? do i have a choice. i noe i cant coaxed my stead well. but why i not given a chance? do i reali need to go back to my past. so that u can c how i love u. when i meet u , den u sae u dun wan go home. joanne ask me to ton together. when we ton. i ask u 2 come over and pei me. u sae," wo shen mer dou bu xi wang zhi xi wang ni mei shi." realli ma?? i alread have a prob. my prob is how to make u come back 2 mi and tell mi ur prob. so i ask her to pei me take cab home. on the way i ask if i could hug her. as i hug her. i dun bear 2 let go. i have the feeling that tis is the last time i could hug her. m i thinking too much? but as i reach home. i could not get 2 slp. m i a coward? a coward that cant face the darkness in the lonely world. Girl, do u know u change my world compeletly? so much that i dunno how 2 live without u. u sae if during this time wen we break i have a crush on a gal juz go. how to?? i dunno. our song yan leh de wei dao. i know the taste. loneliness, scared, pain, hurt and waiting de bitteriness. i just wanna tell you no matter who try to stop us. i will go all the way just to hold your hand. how much i love u? i dunno. very hard to replace u in my heart. on the surface i may look ok. but do u know how much tears i dropped 4 u? do u realli want me to be back to the person in the past? u sae u cannot forget him yet. there is shadow of him in u. but i can slowly let u forget him. but why do we need 2 brk up? i dun wish 2 c u hurt. so i have no choice but to let you go. but the fact in my heart, i dun wish 2 let go. u sae u dun understand me. but why everything you do touches me deep in my heart. everything you do is what i want my stead 2 be. doesnt that mean understanding me?

hee...

2005-09-02T08:05:00.000-07:00

start school 5 daes le.. but still feel e teacher teaching chee bye sian.
dono y other teacher theory nt sian her one so sian. but anyway hope she
can merge with our class.
yup.david thanks ar. 4 helping me reform my blog. hee. carol, dun sad le.
wei hao, we still bro ar? yup... n dear. thanks 4 everything.

i back

2005-07-10T22:38:00.001-07:00

i back

2005-07-10T22:38:00.000-07:00

yoyo.... istana

2005-05-03T00:43:00.000-07:00

long time nv write post... istana, juz went there yesterday. quite a big place but... how 2 sae... very hot and not much ppl... quite a gd experience that i m able 2 talk 2 taufik and sly... they are quite cool yea? but the thing is they come and perform a little bit onli... what 4?? i hope next time wang lee hom can come... k la.. i will be posting story next time.

.... hee....

2005-04-01T08:16:00.000-08:00

... todae... veri shiok... teacher all on mc all on course... so so... no need go school... but after that at noon i went back school 4 training... i noe it is tough but i wanna get a place 4 june competition... the dragon boat festival de.... hope can get... my dear went 2 orchard... dunno y she like orchard so much leh... but nvm.. as long she safe i ok liao... llooll..... den suddenly all those old frend call me... ruyi and jeanette ask mi 2 conference...k la... dats all... haiszzz... rock the fuck on

2004-12-22T07:26:00.000-08:00

In my mind
I can climb
All the mountain that surround me
My spirits there
Where eagles dare to fly
In my heart
There’s a spark
That can light the world around me
An open door
Where I am sure dreams are
Its doesn’t matter if I win
Or the colour of my skin
Cause the race is all about
Believing in yourself
:chorus:
And I dream
I can run like the wind
And be strong when my heart just wants to give it.
I dream
I can be the hero that’s in me when I dream
I dream
If that’s a time , in your life
When the odds are so against you
There’s no defeat if all you keep is pride
First or last
Slow or fast
There’s a diginity that makes you
Keep driving on
When worlds have come apart
It doesn’t matter rich or poor
Or the things you done before
Cause the race is all about
Believing in yourself

I dream of a moment
That forever will be golden
When the torch is passed
Only dream will lasted
That are shared by everyone

2004-12-22T06:23:00.000-08:00

haha!!! merry christmas coming... anyone wanna give me a big big present...birthday dat dae not enuff present leh... haha.. so u all can give me big big present k.. make me happy lahz... k..

First Day

2004-12-22T01:40:00.000-08:00

Welcome to miee bl0g =P

Christmas

2004-12-21T22:48:00.000-08:00

i dun have any big wishes... wish to b happy.. santas ar... can hor.. gv me six pizza... plenty of cheese.... super lots of love and warmth... a lot of gold and shirts.. gimme a very slim body... actuali my wishes is not much... juz wan a very big condo beside sentosa... thhanks SAntas.. MERry~~~ChRISTMAs